Samsung's newest ad writes itself

By now you've seen the articles, posts, tweets, buzzfeed link dumps, et. al. about how the TSA will begin banning uncharged mobile phones from flights out of selected airports abroad.  The reason for this is simple enough, and might be the next great weapon in the fight against...other weapons on planes.

But, after reading the story online, I couldn't stop thinking about one thing...


If you've watched any television recently, you've seen Samsung's new "Wall Huggers" advert, aimed at iPhone owners who are constantly plugged in with their devices, especially at airports.  Forget the fact that Samsung forgot about the rest of us (cough Nexus 5 cough cough), but it's particularly effective attack on Apple and, if you've ever been to a major airport in this country, it's a fairly realistic jab.  Here's the commercial:


With this new ruling, however, wouldn't be a perfect time to unveil an even newer ad?

INT - AN AIRPORT SECURITY LINE, EVENING.  A Man AND A Woman IN BUSINESS ATTIRE RUN THROUGH AN AIRPORT TO A SECURITY CHECKPOINT.  BOTH ARE CARRYING ROLLABOARD CASES IN ONE HAND, AND PHONES IN THE OTHER - THE Man WITH AN iPHONE, THE Woman WITH A SAMSUNG GALAXY S5

MAN (OUT OF BREATH, RUNNING)

We're going to miss this flight

WOMAN (CALMER, LOOKING AT GS5 SCREEN AND GOOGLE NOW)

It's just been backed up by 20 minutes, we should be fine

THEY REACH THE SECURITY CHECKPOINT, TAKE OFF THEIR SHOES AND PLACE ITEMS ON THE CONVEYOR BELT.  THE MAN IS CONSIDERABLY MORE FLUSTERED THAN THE WOMAN.  THEY APPROACH THE TSA Agent.

TSA AGENT

Belts, shoes, laptops, everything through the screener.  Uh, Ma'am, can I see your phone, please?

WOMAN

Sure...

TSA AGENT (TAKES PHONE, IS IMPRESSED WITH IT)

Wow, is that the new Samsung?

WOMAN

Yep.

TSA AGENT (GIVES PHONE BACK TO Woman, WHO PASSES THROUGH SECURITY WITH NO ISSUE)

Thank you, ma'am.  Sir, your phone?

MAN

Uh, yeah, one second, I just have to turn it on

(A BEAT)

Hmmm, I can't get it to...I think the battery's dead.

TSA AGENT

Can you swap it out?  I need to see it functioning to let it through security.

MAN (PRESSING BUTTONS WILDLY TO NO EFFECT)

I...it won't turn on.

WOMAN (WHILE MAKING SEVERAL SWIPES ON HER GS5)

We need to board, let's go!

TSA AGENT (STERNLY)

I'm afraid I can't let you past security with this phone, sir.

MAN (OUT OF OPTIONS)

But, it has my boarding pass on it...is there a wall I can plug into for a second?

WE SLOWLY PULL BACK TO SEE THE WOMAN USING HER GS5, WHILE THE TSA Agent CLICKS A WALKIE TALKIE-

TSA AGENT

TSA requests assistance at Security Gate B

NARRATOR

Don't get caught on the wrong side with the wrong phone.  The Samsung Galaxy S5.  The next big thing is already here.

FADE TO BLACK

So, yeah, there's your next :30 spot, Samsung.  Royalties my way, if you please.